The Dreamer on Death

Death. Kicking the bucket. Passing away. Turning up your toes. Pushing up daisies. Meeting the Maker. Six feet under. Handing in your chips. Going to Davy Jones' Locker. Gone to the Happy Hunting Ground. Biting the Dust. Giving up your Ghost. Croaking. Gone Belly Up. Dead. Death. Lots of ways to look at it. Only one outcome.

We are all putting death blogs up today for our office in memory of the tall guy next door who died this weekend. So, here is mine.

Death is part of life. It is necessary and because we are human, it is tough for us left here. The whys haunt us. Our last phrases and memories of the dead are replaying through our minds. The little things that made the person different make us smile. The thought of never seeing them again or not being able to tie up any loose ends with them makes us sad. It can be a joyous occasion if someone has suffered and we know they "are in a better place", it can be sad if it is a young life cut short or if the death seems senseless.

I have experienced death a lot in my time. My best friend, fiancee, old friends, young people I didnt know. It is never easy. If you look back on their lives it is strange to put the pieces of their puzzles together and see the events leading up to the end. For instance, Ashley - my friend. She put several diary entries in her diary saying things about drunk drivers and how she wanted everyone she loved to be safe. And, if something were to happen to her- she put a message for her family in there. This diary was found on the day of her funeral when they were looking for something to bury with my young friend. You can see these entries on her website - the link is Ashley's Dream on my page. The story written by Mitch Albom is on there too.

In the case of my fiancee, he told me one week before he died that he felt like he had a plan for his life but he had a strong feeling that God had something different for him. He said that whatever happened he would love me until he died and that God's plan is always better than ours. I remember telling him that he was morbid. Then, a week later, he was gone.

So, do people know they are going to die? If not, I think it is strange how it all fits together. Maybe other lives are saved by the lessons learned from the death of others. Maybe the people's work here was done. Maybe we arent supposed to understand death. For me, I am not afraid of death. I know where I am going. I know that everyone I love knows I love them. I know that any apology I need to give has been given. I know that every day I live is lived as if I could not have another. I think I have a mentality of "It's not the number of breaths I take but the number of moments that take my breath away." I do fear losing another person I love though. I hate that pain. That is another blog though!

I do think the people who leave us would tell us to smile when we think of them. To move forward. To acknowledge and respect their memories, but to realize it is a part of life and to keep living. Keep eating. Keep breathing. Know there is a reason even if we dont know what it may be. So, in closing. Death is life. It is hard to let go of people, but it is a fact of life.

The new feelings should be this...Strength to overcome grief. Thankfulness for the time we had. Joy for the life they lived. Peace for their state now. Hope for our futures. And love for their friendships and hearts that will never leave us.